Oops

[stableman]

WHO: Detlef, Lance
WHAT: Looking for a little guidance
WHEN: Current
WHERE: Guardhouse
NOTES: Potentially talk of death and vice and mercy and stuff.

He swings by the guardhouse late afternoon with a few cookies he's bought at the market on the way over. They're bribery. For what, he's not entirely sure. Maybe it's so that Lance will have an excuse to stick around and talk to him? Or will be in a good mood when they talk? Both or either requires Lance to like cookies and Detlef can't say he's ever really paid attention to what the man likes or dislikes. But they're worth a shot, and worst-case scenario, Detlef has to eat all the cookies himself. What a burden.

"Captain?" he calls out as he comes in, looking around.

Comments

[stableman]

It's never been about how they use it in anything he's been taught, but Lance isn't from around this area as far as Detlef knows. Maybe where Lance is from, it's different? It would be nice to believe there's a place where it's all about how you use the Vice, and not if.

"I didn't... I didn't mean to tell you," he protests, shoulders sagging a little. "You came back and asked, and I'm not good at lying. I don't know how people get good at it. Do they lie a lot? But then they're going to be known as--" he cuts himself off and sets the cookies down in reach of Lance so he can rub a temple. "I'll hide it better, and I won't tell people."

He takes a breath.

"What I was taught is that everyone has it, but the moment they use it they're bad and lost and weak and Profane. But you're saying more have it than people think..." Does the Captain not have it? He can't just ask, though.

[infinitewatch]

Lance watches him somewhat sternly as he speaks, but seems to relax a little at the assurance that he won't tell people. Otherwise, he appears somewhat at a loss.
"...I don't know," he admits, "just... heard things, I suppose. Times I've been to Cliffside." It stands to reason that a place with more people will have more Profane, or at least that a greater percentage of them will have the Vice in some way.

He trails off, scratching lightly at his stubbly cheek as he looks out over the town. "That's all Shepherd business, anyway."

[stableman]

There's a stretch of silence before finally Detlef talks again, in a voice that's barely above a whisper: "You don't... have it, then. At all."

Heard things. Not felt it. It lines up with Colin's suspicions and leaves Detlef feeling a little more in doubt about everything. If what he's been told his whole life is wrong, what does that mean? Is it a lie? Is it confusion? Does it mean that the Shepherds all have it and this assume everyone else does which makes them just the same as the people they burn?

And if not everyone is born with it, then why is it such a bad thing instead of seen as a gift from the gods?

[infinitewatch]

The look Detlef receives is a bit wide-eyed, as though Lance is surprised by the mere idea that he might have it. He blinks a few times, thinking it over: he doesn't, does he?
...would he necessarily know?

Finally, he shakes his head with an odd air of apology.

[stableman]

He sits, then, half-falling and half-finding the position on the floor. That's something he's been told all his life. And it's not true.

"That's what, they, everyone has it. That's what the Shepherds say. And only the weak use it. The evil ones. But if..." He gathers himself minutely, taking a breath and looking back up at Lance. "Is it a lie, or are they just wrong?"

Is it purposeful? Or an accident? Because he's not evil. At least not yet, and if he goes evil he's got an agreement for Colin to stop him.

[infinitewatch]

Of all the things Lance is equipped to handle, theology and the theoretical discussion thereof is not among them. He looks like he would probably rather leap off the balcony than try to give Detlef an honest answer, and he just shakes his head uselessly.

"Perhaps-- Father Normand--?" he stammers.

[stableman]

Lance does not deserve this. It's the only constructive thought in Detlef's head as he looks up at the Captain who is just as lost as him. Slowly he nods.

"I'll... I'll try him." Maybe. That might take more explaining than he's up to, but he'll see. For now he'll find his feet again and start heading out, trying and failing to hide how lost he feels right now.